Saturday, October 22, 2011

Between Marriage & Divorce - 22

I wonder what Michelle thinks about what has happened. I don't know what PD said to her when he broke up with her. I'd really like to know how he said it. Was it in person or over the phone?
If he broke up with her in person, did he have one last sexual encounter before breaking the news? One last horrah?

Is she pissed that PD broke up with her?

Is she still trying to contact him?

Was she falling in love with him? Or was it just sex for her?

Well, whatver she is feeling, it can't equate to the turmoil that I've been going through. I still can't believe that I was so blind by this. I keep repeating that to myself. That not only had he made a decision to let he know that he had divorce papers but (oh yeah!) I'm also having an affair. [sigh] I have to release that. I do. I know I do. But it'll take time for me to fully resolve it in my mind.

I wonder how PD is feeling about his visit this week. Is he nervous about what he'll be confronted with? Will he be happy to see me? To be near me? Will he be willing to talk to me in an open manner? Open his heart to me? Bear his true emotions & feelings to me? Will he want to touch me in a loving way?

We're so unstable right now. I'm just hopeful that he will come ready to talk and to work things out together. Not just me. Together.

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